Once upon a chaotic Saturday morning in Soweto, Katlego, the deputy parent, was left in charge of his three siblings—Sipho, Zanele, and baby Nkosi. Their parents, in true South African fashion, announced, “We’re just going to Makro to grab a few things. We’ll be back now-now.” Katlego knew this meant they’d return after the sun had set, possibly with a small fleet of unnecessary Tupperware.

By 10 AM, chaos had erupted. Sipho was channelling his inner Gomora character, stomping around with a mop, yelling, “I am the king of this house now!” Zanele was re-enacting a dramatic fight scene from Uyajola 9/9 with her teddy bears, screaming, “You LIED to me! I saw you at the park with Barbie!” Meanwhile, Nkosi had discovered the magic of Vaseline and was gleefully smearing it on every reachable surface.

Katlego, armed with a broom like he was auditioning for iThemba Lokuphila on Moja Love, attempted to restore order. “Sipho! Drop the mop! Zanele, those teddies are white – they didn’t cheat on each other! And Nkosi, your face is shining like Venda lips after eating greasy KFC chicken pieces!”

Just as Katlego thought he had things under control, the unmistakable beep of the inverter warned him of the real villain of South African life: load-shedding. He checked the schedule on the Eskom Se Push app—stage 6. Four hours of darkness loomed.

“No!” Katlego cried, clutching his head like he’d just been confronted by Jub Jub himself. “How am I supposed to feed you guys now?”

“Let’s order Roman’s pizza,” Sipho suggested, his face lighting up.

“With what money?” Katlego retorted. “Or should I pay in exposure like that cousin who’s a promoter?”

Zanele said, “We can eat Weet-Bix! They don’t need electricity.”

“No! I’m not eating dry Weet-Bix again!” Sipho protested dramatically, collapsing onto the couch like he was cast for Mina Nawe House.

Katlego took a deep breath and channelled his inner madala wisdom. “Okay, deputy parent powers, activate. We’re making ama kota.

With Nkosi strapped to her back like a seasoned vendor on Vilakazi Street, Katlego rallied his troops. They pulled out the loaf of Sasko Sam white bread, last night’s leftover mince, and slap-chips from the freezer that they quickly fried on the gas stove. Sipho grated cheese as if his life depended on it, while Zanele handled the atchar, occasionally stealing bites and grimacing at the spice.

In 20 minutes, dinner was served. The humble kota—a South African street food icon—saved the day. As they ate in the dim glow of candles, Katlego realized he had done it again.

But just as he started to relax, the power returned, and the TV blared to life, revealing Rea Tsotella in full drama mode.

“That’s you, Katlego,” Sipho teased, pointing at the screen. “Always shouting at us like that guy!”

“Keep talking, Sipho, and you’ll be the next case on Ufelani,” Katlego shot back with a grin.

The house erupted in laughter, and for a moment, all the chaos and drama were worth it. Katlego may have been a deputy parent, but he was also the glue that held their crazy family together—and the master of the load-shedding meal hack.

After all, ‘n Broer Maak ‘n Plan!

[The End]

enjoyed reading katlego thulare's short story? subscribe to be the first to know Jou Ma Se Boek

BE THE FIRST TO GET THE STORIES

* indicates required
order a copy of welcome to south africa jou ma se boek

Welcome to South Africa – Jou Ma Se Boek

(9 customer reviews)
R850,00

Welcome to South Africa – Jou Ma se Boek includes an A4 book, with an enamel cup, packaged in a premium box. It’s a coffee table book that details the extraordinary life of an ordinary South African. Personal deliveries (JHB, PTA, Midrand) will include the shopping bag.

326 in stock (can be backordered)

Add to wishlist
SKU: 659525074593
Category:
Tags: , ,

Comments (7)

Leave a Reply to Mamoabi Phori Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *